In my December blog, I wrote about Self Care. I’m surprised by the number of people who reached out to thank me for the reminder, and actually, to just kind of chat about it. So, as I sit writing this, we are in a Provincial Lock Down here in Ontario, so I’m going to talk about checking in with yourself once again.
When I reflect on that feedback, and the conversations I’ve had with many Landscape Professional members during the CongressConnect week, I’ve come to a conclusion: The majority of us are cruising through our days and weeks in the same ship: we’re stressed and we’re tired and we’re numb to it.
On the surface, most are telling me “I’m good, it’s all good”. But when we talk or 5 or 10 minutes, what bubbles to the surface are anecdotes about how different things are, how the lock down is impacting family, friends, routines, how we spend our time, and how rarely we laugh and smile. It all adds up to an undercurrent of stress.
I felt it throughout the CongressConnect week. (For those of you unfamiliar with the infamous ‘Congress week’, its every January, with over 14,000 landscape professionals coming through the door for tradeshow, symposiums, live demo’s, seminars, keynote lunches and more). While the Landscape Ontario Team did an OUTSTANDING job creating the first-ever virtual event, the awesome SPONSORS stepped up and engaged, the VENDORS put their best products and digital content for us all to peruse with friendly staff at the ready to Chat, and the SPEAKERS all brought themselves fully to their presentations with great content – something was missing…. And it wasn’t just me who felt it. And, it left me feeling a bit empty and kind of lonely. The footprint of Covid-19.
What’s missing are the faces. The voices. The laughter. The smiles. The nods of recognition when you see an acquaintance you met last year. The conversations outside of the seminar rooms. The chance encounters. And yes, shaking hands in a friendly greeting and meaning it. I think it’s this part of the Provincial Shut Down that’s hardest on us all. The physical void between you and everyone else.
I’m also finding that there’s virtual overload. Sure, Zoom calls help to keep us connected with each other, but having to tap the space bar just to chime in on fun group banter leaves ‘the moment’ expired in the conversation. And having to manage the ‘bandwidth’ you’re sharing with everyone else in the house just so Zoom won’t freeze on you, is wearing thin for many. In the midst of our newly virtual world, emotional, mental and spiritual self-care seems a lower priority. Lost in the space between changed routines, losing freedom and staying home.
I heard a friend say the other day that she was struggling with her husband working from home in ‘her’ daytime space. Like me, she works from her own home office full time. What she told her husband was this: “I may have married you for better or for worse, but not for lunch.” After I stopped laughing, I realized she was on to something. In this pandemic, we’ve lost, among other things, our own personal rhythm. Whether it’s personal space, mind space, or mental space. For many, the world is kind of imploding rather than expanding. Sooner or later, we all get tired of the computer screen, the tv and surfing the web. We just want to meet a friend for coffee or dinner out someplace where there’s activity and laughter.
So, let me ask: How are you FEELING? All of you, your head, your heart, your spirit.
In a recent conversation with my friend and LO colleague (and Georgian Lakelands Chapter past President) Lexi Dearborn, she shared these thoughts about pandemic stress:
“My clients are important but I’m more importanter.” This is my take-away from the stressful 2020 Pandemic landscape season. I thought I had this one! Only to find I didn’t. For me, my stress release has always been the gym. If I could get to the gym 3-4 times a week, I feel better, look better, and my stress is under control. I leave my stress at the gym. There, I get much needed ‘alone time’ which does wonders for my well-being and brain power. Of course, my gym was closed for much of the season, and walking on a jobsite just isn’t the same as pumping a bit of iron. No gym + Stress = Little sleep. I can take on the world with 8 hours of sleep. But I found towards the end of last season, I was sleeping less and less each night. With a lack of sleep came a lack of productivity…. Or even caring if I was productive. Putting my mental and physical well-being second to my clients needs through the pandemic created a very strung-out, stressed-out, and unhappy me. I’m re-learning to put myself first.”
Thanks Lexi. We all need to put ourselves first. Especially right now.
So to my readers, please check in with yourself as we move through our ‘down time’ months and ramp back up toward spring. You ARE More Importanter.
Your tanks need to be full in a couple of months. All 4 of them: Physical, Mental, Spiritual, Emotional
Please make sure that you’re taking good care of your mental health. Everyone else is telling you how to look after your physical health. It’s the other layers that I’m suggesting you pay attention to. Check in. Be self reflective. Take good care of you.
Please.
It's my sincerest hope that a year from now, we could all go back and read this blog and think: “Ya, that sure was a weird and trying time – glad that’s over”.
Onwards